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As ever, I will be keeping a close and beady eye on the market movers and shakers and provide my sage summarised comments. Even though the ealry doors favourite went on to win last year, it was hardly stellar. And I'm very much getting the same vibes this time around. "the stage name" Laurence is this year's likely winner and I'm not disagreeing as frankly there's nothing else pre-reghearsal that comes close. 2018: My tips Israel (Win 7/4 - 1st) So what do I reckon? As usual it's a crap shoot, but good luck in your random acts of betting... |
| Average Odds |
Notes |
|
| Netherlands | 7/4 |
Bookies suggest it's already a done deal. It's a simple ditty & rightly the favourite, but no classic all the same. |
| Russia | 5/1 |
Over produced, over stylised, over sung, & over here. WIll it create European harmony? I'm not sure. |
| Switzerland | 6/1 |
What on earth are the Swiss doing this high up? A workaday latino number enlivened by a young buck. |
| Sweden | 9/1 |
Gospel soul isn't your staple ESC choice, but it doesn't stop the Swedes. I like it, but not enough to excel. |
| Italy | 11/1 |
I fear more over-choreography from a nation that gives the contest a tracery of quality otherwise sadly absent |
| Iceland | 12/1 |
Lordy! S&M and ESC collide in a SMESC miasma. The visuals are novel, the song heinous, the band wearing. |
| Cyprus | 16/1 |
If it ain't broke. More olive-fuelled stomping which may result in more relative success. Good luck to them. |
| Greece | 16/1 |
Don't get the appeal of this, sure she's appears to be capable the but the song is florid trumps. |
| Malta | 20/1 |
Another minnow finding themselves with a betting nose bleed. It's passable, but may fade into background |
| Norway | 28/1 |
At last, the Sami rapper you have been looking for! Euro-trance with more rolling vowels than Countdown. |
| Portugal | 33/1 |
Be-masked ex-sex shop worker where the whiff of his song recalls the scent of used anal beads. |
| Azerbaijan | 66/1 |
Not without merit, a return of sorts to Azeri form. A bearded hipster emotes via the medium of pop. Ok. |
| France | 66/1 |
Bleached youtuber who if he wasn't French may have a chance. But he is, so he doesn't. |
| Slovenia | 50/1 |
Time to check if your shoes are clean. Dream pop type minimalism which I rather like once, twice at a push. |
| Armenia | 66/1 |
Uhuu. Mild bombast should help to get it further than it probably deserves. She'll give it large. |
| Australia | 66/1 |
Popera shocker with a dress that will offend as much as the singer. Nothing held back apart from taste. |
| Denmark | 80/1 |
Massive chair, even larger mouth. There's a saccharin shortage in Europe cos the Danes have it all. |
| Czech Rep | 80/1 |
Part of me thinks this is a grind of a grind of a grind. The other bit enjoys students trying to improve their lot. |
| Belgium | 100/1 |
Loo break |
| Macedonia | 100/1 |
Newly named North Macedonia heading south on the leaderboard. The female yousuck. |
| Germany |
125/1 |
Enthusiasm trumps ability yet again in a pair of unrelated off-key wannabes shouting a crude monstrosity. |
| Estonia | 150/1 |
Somewhat comforting throwback of a Swedish power ballad in Tallinn. Upper mid table potential. |
| Albania | 150/1 |
The usual Albanian quality wail over a stinking song. Not much else to say so I won't. |
| Spain | 150/1 |
Living down to expectation, well-worn stereotypical cheeriness with added flamenco chords. Kids party time |
| UK | 150/1 |
Geordie big baby Rice will be giving it plenty and getting precisely jack-all in return. Boiled or Fried, not fragrant |
| Ireland | 200/1 |
Aah, dis-interesrted Dolcis shop girl almost does good. A noughties feel, but that's downright progressive |
| Israel | 200/1 |
I'm not a politico but there's something about this that makes me a tad uncomfortable. Call to arms. |
| Hungary | 200/1 |
If you want a jokey papa then I'd recommend Jim Royle instead, at least he's got a home. Good wordplay. |
| Finland | 200/1 |
It's got the feel of a touch of the Watermans, his 15 mins of fame long since gone. Abject in every sense. |
| Austria | 250/1 |
Approach with care, it may turn your hair blue. |
| Croatia | 250/1 |
It's Croatian, nuff said. One for the price of two. |
| Romania | 250/1 |
Successfully suggesting the after effects of pulling an all Saturday nighter. DT's are more pleasant. |
| Serbia | 250/1 |
Shouty Balkan ballard that to my ears is a dead genre. An ex-genre, a genre that has ceased to be. Or should. |
| Litnuania | 250/1 |
Shrill repellent pop, the type of which I suggest you avoid. A big cat mauling is distinctly preferable. |
| Montenegro | 250/1 |
Words fail me, they really do. If this is a so-called "supergroup", what on earth are "groups" like? |
| San Marino | 250/1 |
How low can you go? Serhat low, that's how low. So bad it's either not-quite good or just the best thing ever. |
| Latvia | 250/1 |
I want to forget it already. Oh, I just have. |
| Georgia | 250/1 |
That was a guttural descent into hell. You'll only have the one chance to catch this, which is the good news |
| Poland | 250/1 |
Butter churners without the obvious charms or indeed performance ability. A long 3 mins this. |
| Moldova | 250/1 |
I'll let them off occasionally for the odd lapse into earnest tripe. Shouldn't be 2nd bottom in t'betting tho |
| Belarus |
250/1 |
Poor kid, she doesn't deserve to be bottom, although everything is relative. Highly unlikely qualifier. |
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