|
|
As ever, I will be keeping a close and beady eye on the market movers and shakers and provide my sage summarised comments. As I write this by common consent this is the most open contest since arguably 2003. This is reflected in that megastar from the ever present Russia is the hotly tippped favourite, but what seems to have been overlooked is that the song is derivative drivel. So although some damp fans do see merit in Mr Lazarev's high-tech hokum many (including myself) don't. Evidence of the wide open nature of 2016 can also be drawn from this year's Swedish MF. The winner, Frans, who broadly mumbles his way through a Marmite ear-worm promptly flew in at 7/4 favourite for the whole thing in early March. It has very much drifted since then and now sits third favourite. After that I can make a case for at least 10 more. I leave that to you, but for what it's worth there are two stand-outs quality-wise and alongside Spain I have a funny early feeling for the upbeat perkiness of the French. And obviously Sweden... We shall see. 2015: My tips Sweden (Win 12/5 -1st),
Hungary (Each Way 150/1 - 20th) So what do I reckon? As usual it's a crap shoot, but good luck in your random acts of betting... |
| Average Odds
taken from a selection of online UK bookmakers - dated 4th April |
||
| Average Odds |
Notes |
|
| Russia | 7/4 |
Bookies suggest it's already a done deal. I'm unconvinced. No shortage of self-confidence, less actual talent |
| Sweden | 11/1 |
Has been on the slide, but undeniably catchier than zika. Lena-like drawl may be too much, but top5 likely |
| Australia | 12/1 |
Unsurprisingly welcomed back. Seen as a step down from '15 and likely to be a step down on the leaderboard |
| France | 9/4 |
This is the year of the Big5, headed by Amir, a pleasingly merry pop number. Could be rare success for them. |
| Malta | 16/1 |
One of those last minute changes to song which for me doesn't work. Ira won't be runner-up again. |
| Ukraine | 14/1 |
Time for a stiff drink. A wail about war morphing into D&B. A typical Ukrainian hot-potch which kinda works |
| Croatia | 16/1 |
No shocks that it's Croat ballardery but in English and decent. This will give them a top10 (for once) |
| Latvia | 20/1 |
Bemused by a damp fan favourite. When did burgundy leather jackets come back in fashion? Deeply average |
| Serbia | 16/1 |
Chanson alert with added head wobble. Big hair & attitude and all the better for it. Definitely worth a look |
| Armenia | 18/1 |
40 seconds of a plane taking off followed by enjoyably rumbunctious pub-singing & duduk nonsense. |
| Bulgaria | 25/1 |
Pretty Poli is back with a much stronger effort, a slice of Noughties dance-pop that appeals. I like it. |
| Spain | 25/1 |
Say Yay!. My tops for the year. Already a Euroclub classic, let's practise those heel twirls. |
| Italy | 33/1 |
Another decent effort from Rome (with some English).. Expect hi-tech Mans-stuff which adds precisely nothing. |
| Azerbaijan | 33/1 |
It's probably gonna take a miracle to win, likely destined for mid-table |
| Poland | 50/1 |
Szpak beat a ESC runner up & THE pre-season tip to get to Stockholm. The Poles may have chosen badly |
| Cyprus | 33/1 |
Surprisngly short odds for what is a rock-lite band. Fair enough effort but don't see this genre as excelling |
| Hungary | 40/1 |
Decent gargling-with-Domestos hirsute beefcake. And there are a few. With a big drum. Not without a chance. |
| Czech Rep | 40/1 |
Starting to wonder what they feed the girls in Prague. Pixilated ballardry which may find them in their 1st Final |
| Germany | 50/1 |
Mad as a box of frogs manga costume clashes with a dreary presentation. Very solid song, could surpise. |
| Iceland | 66/1 |
Solid hi-tech presentation & voice shouldn't rescue what is a fresh turd of a song. |
| Netherlands | 66/1 |
Amsterdam must be twinned with Gnashville. More low rent C&W & a singular lack of imagination. Should fail |
| Norway | 100/1 |
Agnete has said it's either a love or loathe it entry. I'm the latter. |
| Austria | 80/1 |
What's the French for twee? |
| Lithuania | 150/1 |
Donny's back! And he can see this time! But before you celebrate, I have to point out it's similarly cr#p pop |
| Ireland |
150/1 |
Proof if proof was needed for the Brit viewer that "established" stars doesn't equal success in ESC. Mundane. |
| UK | 150/1 |
The biggest odds in living memory which won't build confidence. It's OK you know, but will still be bottom 5. |
| Belgium | 150/1 |
That bastion of Moppet production the Belgians have sadly found another. Mildly dis(co)tasteful slim-fit Annie |
| Estonia | 150/1 |
Feels like a boy pretending to be a man. The dullest choice from their final and can't honeslty recommend |
| Denmark | 150/1 |
From the land of sharpest scissors comes another clean-cut act, a male trio with all the edge of Cirkelbroen |
| Israel | 150/1 |
Not one to be afraid of foundation, Hovi is less Steve Strange and more Norman Mildly Unusual. |
| Greece | 250/1 |
Normally the ever dependant ethno-Greek effort falls flat. Very flat. |
| Belarus | 250/1 |
Expect nudey 80's nonsense from the lank-haired pallid soft rocker. Slim waistline, slim chances |
| FYROM | 250/1 |
Another returnee that shouldn't have bothered. Balkan balls |
| Romania | 250/1 |
Figment of fun from the goth humpty dumpty. Trying to tap into the GoT crowd but more hillock then Mountain |
| Finland | 250/1 |
A touch of the chunky 90's Stansfield's in a dance pop lite number that fails to shine. Lower mid-table awaits |
| Moldova | 250/1 |
Slightly put upon by the bookies, but not by much. A punching above it's weight Moldovan ingenue. Unlikely |
| Switzerland | 250/1 |
Suspected dodgy vocal ability aside, this is a peculiar Roman statue floaty bit of fluff that is a non-qualifier |
| Albania | 250/1 |
Another one of those efforts where you're not sure if there's a song present. I'm not 100% convinced |
| Bos & Herz | 250/1 |
A kind of ethnic Bosnian Weeble supergroup. You knock 'em and they wobble for three minutes |
| Georgia | 250/1 |
The year's amusing disaster. There's a creditable song but the show will not be electric |
| Montenegro | 250/1 |
3 minutes that lasts 8. A metaphorical deserted rock quarry filled with slurry. But there is one worse... |
| San Marino | 250/1 |
And this is it. I give you Serhan, who combines headbands & monocles. And lounging in an offensive manner |
| Slovenia | 250/1 |
Seems churlish to criticise when it follows the two above. The kid's party entry. One for Jizney |
 |
 |
  |
 |
 |